Living Zen Life

The necessities of mourning found me
as I hid among unnecessary ways
found a way to break through
my dim and defended thinking
finally surprisingly I heard its sound
ringing inside as a solemn bell
sounding through me touching my loss
tolling my being old and alone.

How will I manage in these years
take care of myself in uncertainties
diminishing health and mental capacity
what else I try not to imagine
her daughters and granddaughter 
will think of me worry about me
I need think of them
who have no obligation towards me
yet they are good they care
they would help me as they can
this too found a way to reach me
so unexpectedly as I'd begun
to mourn my wife her death
and being alone 
they live with each other in me
I took a step one I am able to take
at seventy-three years
to prepare for one more home
living with others
who share my age and many my loss 
together we can find the way for us
though as of yet I know none of them.